I found this in a blog that I follow, it is SO true!:

 I found this in a blog that I follow, it is SO true!: 

When you lose a baby....(by http://naomiscircle.blogspot.com/)

When someone loses a baby, it's common for people around them to minimize the loss, at least in their minds, by comparing it to a later loss.  At least it was early in the pregnancy...at least it wasn't a late loss...it would be so much harder if it was such-and-such an age.

What people don't always realize is that when we lose a baby, no matter what age in the womb, we lose a unique person, and we lose the child, the teenager, the adult that person would have been.

I lost Jordan in May at four weeks' gestation.  "Barely pregnant" people might say.  But when I lost Jordan...

• I lost the full-term baby I would have delivered next February.
• I lost a toddler who will never need me to kiss a scraped knee.
• I lost a five-year-old who will never start kindergarten.
• I lost a teen-ager who will never make me cringe by learning to drive my car.
• I lost a high school graduate whom I won't help pack for college.
• I lost a young adult whom I will never plan a wedding for.
• I lost a lifetime of memories that will never be made. 

Hence, my sadness.  The loss of a precious individual, a unique mix of my husband and me,whom I will not know this side of heaven.  If you, too, have had a very early loss like mine, know that you are allowed to grieve, that it is normal to grieve.  You many sometimes wonder if it was a dream, if you really were pregnant.  You were, and your baby lives on in the presence of a holy, loving God.  But it's normal and human and motherly to wish your baby were still with you now, and to shed many precious tears for the life that would have been.

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I hate when people say: "well at least you weren't full term and have  to deliver the baby."  But what they fail to realize is that because I wasn't full term I didn't get the chance to hold my baby, I didn't get the chance to tell him goodbye, I didn't get to count his fingers and toes....I didn't get these last moments that would have hurt but would have also given me closure. And another thing that people fail to realize is I loved my baby from day one.  Yes, I may have been EXTREMELY shocked when I found out I was pregnant and it may have took me a few weeks to fully get excited HOWEVER I LOVED THAT LITTLE GUY, WITH ALL OF MY HEART from day one.  I regret our decision to have a D&C but at the time we did what we thought was best.  I'm still not sure if I could have handled holding him and then giving him to someone and never seeing him again.....  but that is something that I will never know, and I can't dwell on it.  


On a lighter note, the elephants came in yesterday!  Now I am in the process of finding helpful resources and typing it all up.  So if any of my readers (all two of you, LOL) knows of any good books or sites that might be of help please send them my way.