So today has been a difficult day for me...I have several friends who are pregnant and a few are entering the 2nd trimester and one found out today that she is having a boy....And while I am thrilled that they are blessed with healthy pregnancies, it's hard to handle sometimes. It makes me sad and even jealous. So, anyway Haidie-bug and I went to my best friend "A"s house today. And she could tell that I was feeling down so she shows me her necklace that her husband gave her....but she also added a best friend charm. I was like "aww that's so sweet, who gave you that?" and she said "someone special" and she hands me a box. I was thinking that it was the other half of the charm and it was but it was on a charm bracelet, filled with charms that will remind me of my living children, Ian, and my friends. It is truly one of the most thoughtful gifts I have ever received! She said she had been working on it for a while and was going to wait to give it to me but she could tell I need a little pick-me-up.
on the bracelet there is: 2 little boys (Brycen and Ian), a little girl (Haiden), a support ribbon (because she knows how I feel about raising awareness), an elephant( because of our "elephant ministry") an angel( to remind me that Ian is dancing with angels), a butterfly (because of the butterfly that we found on the day we found out that Ian had passed), a best friend charm (self explainable),a cross( to remind me of my faith in God, and know that he has a plan for me and my life) a picture of a tree (because,when we first started hanging out James and A were talking about how friends were like trees: you have some that are like the leaves and will leave you at the drop of a hat; you have the weaker branches, who will be there through the good times but when times get hard they disappear; the trunk that while sturdy can still be chopped down....and then you have the roots! The roots are deep and hold the tree up when all else fails)
I thank God for her! She's never been afraid of talking about Ian, in fear of upsetting me. She calls him by name! I know to some that may seem weird that calling him by his name makes me happy but when I lost him, I learned that many people don't really consider him a baby so to have someone acknowledge him and call him by name is a blessing! She also made cupcakes for him on the day of our d&c. She has let me cry and actually cried with me! So, "A" if you're reading this: I love you! Thank you for being a root!